One Christmas evening..

A Christmas of blogging cannot go without this one. I wrote this back in class 7 and needless to say I absolutely love it.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!!

The sky glowed with the stars at night,
The moon smiled splendidly adding to the sight,
The land hid under the blanket of snow,
I found my spirits suddenly rise and glow-
The echo of the jingling bells,
And the melodious carols sung by those dressed like fairies and elves,
As if the winds whispered in my ear,
Wishing me luck and prosperity for the coming year.
The Xmas tree was decorated and the gifts were exchanged,
But I waited for the moment,
When through the chimney of my room-
Would come my dear santa with a zooooom
And would put my gift on the bedside,
Perhaps even ask me for a ride.
While I was living in my thoughts,
I saw a streak of light travel across,
I shivered with fright and fear,
But it was a sleigh run by a reindeer,
I stared a while-
At the man who greeted me with a smile,
He flung a hand and bade goodbye,
While I still stood there wishing 'Hi',
Then away he went into the depths of moon,
Promising me that he would come very soon,
I kept staring with a long pause
‘coz I just couldn’t believe I had met a real Santa Claus!

A familiar place..

More than 5 years it’s been since I last set foot here. Nothing has changed, yet everything has. The king has left though he looks upon and would so forever, I know. The Queen knows he will never return but still she waits. The ring on her finger has been intact since the past 60 years. The sheen has not faded and nor the love. And yes, the king visits her in her dreams, she tells me, so she does not complain much.

The same destination where we longed to spend our summer vacations. The king was our master story teller- He told stories of far off places, of angels and demons, of how the hero struggles through oceans of dragons and snakes to get hold of an emerald that saves the life of his love, of how the stars at night turn into our guardians so we are safe at our homes. He would address all our new found fascinations about Urdu, Punjabi, Pakistan, Painting, God, reincarnations, aliens and what not. He would never tire. Never. He was our hero, our learned one, our King- Still is.

The “mohallah” is not all the same. New houses have sprung up. The all-pervasive pigs have miraculously disappeared and thankfully so. The grocery store “Bille ki dukan”, just a meter away, has been closed. He now makes bags and sells them, I m told. The residents have changed, some replaced, and some have just grown older. Our house is being painted after aeons it seems. As I sit in the drawing room on the first floor, I can hear the workers shouting. But more prominent is the gossip of the inhabitants- The Queen reminiscing her time in Multan, Pakistan; the kinsfolk scandalizing the remotest possible hearsay, the kids talking about how school went- all at the same time. White smoke comes out with every breath, as I speak through my clattering teeth, replying to their inquiring calls of where I have been. Sun has finally conquered the foggy morning- Time to soak up the sun.

As I sit in the car to head for the railway station, I look for a familiar face to peep out of the wall on the other end of the house as we speed past it, but he does not show up this time. In my heart I know, somehow he is still there, teary-eyed, saying goodbye, like always. I do not, however, know when I would return. I hope I do soon- To the most beautiful Queen, whose features I wish I had inherited, to the town that is never silent- The town of fairies at nights and kulfies and chats and loads of play during the day- The town of my childhood- The land of Yamuna. Yamuna nagar.

To, The Messenger..

"While the sun was away from you and
you were lost in your spaces and dreams,
I was here with him listening to his stories of you.

He told me of how shy he becomes,
when he looses to your bright smile.
But said he felt good as it has been a long time since he lost.

He told me how you befriended the moon and the stars.
They fools thought you liked them,
but you loved the spaces between them to travel away and far.

Now he would be leaving me,
and I will head for my journey left incomplete.
May be in dreams I might complete the distance seven seas apart."

-Moudgi
------------------------------------------------------------------------

I blinked and the sun was gone,
And I let him go too.
He had to brighten another world,
another dawn.

He lent me his best,
And told you he lost.
Humility is what is preached,
by the greatest.

Away I go,
To own the unknown,
more than the moon and stars,
I seek the light through the shadow.

Seven seas across,
When sun lights up your way again,
give him my best,
tell him he knew me well.

"Some of the fiercest battles in life are the battles within."

The dwarfs of Upkobtes :)

Long long ago, somewhere on the planet lived an evil demon named Buro. He used to travel from one place to another in search of targets and ways to execute his wicked deeds. Once he entered a silent little town named Upkobtes, inhabited by little dwarfs who had no cruel intentions. Following his modus operandi, the demon started to befriend the inhabitants by putting on the mask of a witty and amusing dwarf. One of the dwarfs named Yera who was ever so gullible and polite, was swept off in his scheme of plans. He made Yera a great friend of his and started telling him how everyone around hated him so much and had always plotted against him. Yera's earlier friends, who he no more played with, saw a drastic change in him. Yera now stuck with Buro in the mask of a boy and started helping him in his evil exploits. So, now they both were inseparable and spent most of the time scheming, and talking ill about others. Slowly and eventually, the dwarfs of Upkobtes started realizing their intentions and kept away from them. They sometimes dared to confront them but evil duo would scare them away. The dwarfs were in awe because Buro and Yera pretended they were smarter and wittier than others. The demon was more like a barking dog that never could bite. But his barking scared the others- Which is why, in no time he had played evil games with almost everyone and was still around the town looking for more ways to bother.

In Upkobtes, also lived a dwarf named Turf, who was not so friendly with the other dwarfs, but never hurt them intentionally. He was known for his reclusive nature and bad temper and the dwarfs seldom took pains to make friends with him. He knew about the demon and the growing atrocities that he vent upon the dwarfs. But he could not care less, as long as Buro did not mess with him. But Buro did. And Turf confronted him and told him off. The demon faltered a bit and started being wary of Turf. At about the same time, a small group of somewhat brave dwarfs also joined hands to fight against evil. But they had their own differences and Buro tried to use that by directing them against each other. The remaining dwarf population was either too scared or too lame. Despite the growing opposition, Buro and Yera manipulated, plotted and schemed. There was no stopping them.

A kind wizard, named Rhok who lived in the far corner of Upkobtes was a witness to the sad plight of the dwarfs. But he knew he was not a part of their community and could not do much. He contemplated a great deal on why the community of dwarfs, smarter than Buro and Yera, were not able to take them down? What was it that the demon and his new found friend did that made the resident dwarfs so disarmed? In order to find that out, Rhok invited Turf and Griw, one of the members of the brave dwarfs to dinner. Turf was adamant at first, but later agreed. Griw obliged too. Once inside his cave, Turf and Griw greeted each other superficially as neither was particularly fond of the other. Rhok offered wine to Turf and to Griw he offered pancakes. Griw finished his pancakes soon while Turf still had his wine glass full as he was already regretting having come for a dinner that was turning out to be such a drag. After a few minutes, Rhok announced that it was all a plot and that he had put a spell on them. The spell was that if Turf had not finished what he was offered and Griw had finished what he was offered they would both choke to death. Turf and Griw panicked and it was a matter of seconds before they felt a lump in their throats. They started choking and gasping for breath but none helped each other. The wizard then said that the only way the spell could be broken was if they both shared the wine equally, not a drop more not a drop less. Both were smart and managed to drink just the exact amount. They stopped panting for breath and the wizard directed them to sit down.

He told them they were responsible for both their actions and inactions. Action in case of Griw and inaction on part of Turf.
He also told them that only when they got together, used their wits and shared that they could save each others’ lives.
With a smile on his face Rhok then told them that he had never put a spell on anyone of them. He just scared them with his false claims. The lumps in their throat was nothing but their anxiety and apprehension. He advised them: Not to believe until you know.

Turf and Griw realized what this was directed at. They went back and spread this message amongst their peers. Soon, the realm of Buro ended. No one ever knew or tried to find out what happened to Yera. And the dwarfs of Upkobtes lived happily ever after.

Disclaimer: This is entirely a work of fiction. Resemblance to any person/dwarf living or dead is PURELY coincidental ;)

Drew Carey and People Who Hate Their Job

For the better and for good..

I am not this sociable person that you meet all the time. I am one of the standoffish types that you would hardly want to meet and if you should know, I am not particularly proud of this. But once you know me or so they say, I am not that bad. Well, I couldn’t care less about that one either. It’s not like I abhor mankind. Maybe, it’s like there are a few people who I care about so much that I could give a rat’s ass about the others. Oh, but there are people I admire- for their guts, for their simplicity, for their attitude, for their ambitions and more. And there are people I marvel at- for being liars, backstabbers, connivers, hypocrites and even more. I prefer to be a silent observer. Not while someone’s firing at me though.

Anyways so, I am not that friendly. Period. Now today, while I was my usual self, something happened. After giving a tiring presentation, I was getting my things together to leave the class. I needed to plug out my laptop charger from a multi-point socket. I switched the common switch off and this lady in my class flipped. She says “you don’t just do that man! I had no battery and now that you switched it off my laptop is gone.” So I had a dream last night that her laptop was on the verge of a battery showdown and the very moment I would switch off the power would spell apocalypse for it. No I did not. And No I did not tell this to her either. All I did was collect my laptop with my trap shut and walked out. This is something I normally don’t do- You know; listen to BS without giving it back. Then, I was thinking all the time, for sometime, why I did not do what I did not do?

I don’t know. I have nothing against her or the likes of her. I simply don’t care enough. I would probably smile the next time I see her. Because I guess for once I wasn’t mean. And well, I got something to write in my blog :)Anyways,The whole point is that, I guess you learn to comfort yourself in ways that you could never think of.

It’s like when you do something that you normally do- you brush it aside by saying that Hey! That’s how I am! Can’t help it! And then when you don’t do something that you normally tend to do, and you surprise yourself, you say things like I said- you know, atleast for once I didn’t do that! Which means this was the one time I was like that. Next time, It’s me you’ll see.
But maybe, sometimes, and this happens rarely, you do change for the better and for good.

To be or not to be.

Sometime back I asked someone if being impulsive was a good thing. He had apparently said yes and no and I kind of know what he meant. You know, he was just being polite by saying so. He actually said ‘DUhh’ in his head. And it was a dumb question anyways. You know it’s like when you act a particular way and you know that you do, you try and validate whether it’s the right thing to do. Guess I should replace the ‘you’s with ‘I’s? Anyways so I am impulsive. In certain ways. And I like it like that.

However, there can be dire consequences associated with being impulsive. See, I could use ‘thoughtless’ instead of impulsive which may be the right thing to do. And when I am not thinking, I might do things that may not seem wrong at that point in time, but may actually be wrong for/to someone. So, the thing is that I have been thinking about the not so great part of being impulsive lately and I have actually started to think, umm… a lot before acting. Now I am like, I am sure there is nothing absolutely magnificent about being impulsive anyway! Thinking about something for hours at length and getting a massive headache and a bomb ticking away centrally in your forehead is a feeling nothing can surpass. Trust me!! It is loads of fun. Yawn.

This Book ‘Blink’ by Malcolm Gladwell caught my eye recently. I have just started to read it so I cannot critically glorify or tarnish it. It talks of those moments when we ‘know’ something in the blink of an eye without really knowing why. He talks of how one could read seemingly complex situations in a matter of a few seconds. Sounds interesting. I have those moments all the time except that I miserably fail to decode those complex situations.

Well, the impulsive part of me still lives and shall resurface; I am sure, in no time. And I have NO clue whatsoever whether that’s great or pathetic. But I would certainly try to balance both. You know eating the dark lord and playing hide and seek. No you fool! Both- being decisive and impulsive. Anyways, but I’d really like to be able to quit my job someday and go backpacking on the Alps with people who like me and listen to me. Okay, the last part was way overboard. That’s like asking God to step down and crown me the king of the world.

I know this post is getting way too creepy and mindless and full of shit. But Hey! This is MY blog. I write what I want to!

This is so much fun :) We should do this more often.

Forever starts now..

The pain is lasting.
And now you realize it.
Shut your mind, slay your soul,
and you run away.
Do you hear the jarring of thoughts?
Or the far cry of your soul?
No wonder the faith lost you.

The tear in your eye shall take leave too.
As mutely as the smile did.
Lest you know the end is near.
And that forever starts now!

A stone wears but it can't feel.
The darkness haunts.
Memories break.
Hurt bothers.
Helplessness vexes.
Or does it?
Wonder of all wonders.
You live a life being yourself.

A candle in the murk, you blew it merrily.
A hand of trust, you twisted it brutally.
I took you to fly high; you pushed me all the way down.
I fought to drive your blues away; you always juggled to make me fear.
Explanations I never sought. Never would.
Amazed, I'll always be.

You are so lost now.
Is there a way out of the dreary dungeons you ask?
The answers you seek are yours alone.
Hope that you triumph will be mine. I promise.
Like you, even I would wish.
The end was not near.
And that forever did not start now!

Do you hear the call ?

Politics
Music
Animals
Photography
Baseball
Cooking
Comics
Nation
Porn
Football
Poetry
Numbers
Children
Karate
Fashion
Wildlife
Travel
Gadgets
Boyfriends
Videogames
History
Depression
Christianity
Family
Astronomy
Books
Business
America
Money

As random as they have been listed, more varied, and less unanticipated they are. People call it their passion, obsession or more simply love or like. The list above shows the themes on which blogs on blogspot are based on. They have been listed in the order they appeared when I clicked ‘next blog’ after mine.

Are you passionate about something? Does something make you feel like you can go through the rest of your life doing it, exploring it, being with it or talking/writing about it and loving it? Have you found the calling in your life?

Unfortunately, we are not born photographers, politicians or psychopaths. It would have been much easier that way. It would have made sense to say loud and clear that “I was born to do this!” But since that is not the case, we want to go and look out for the reason for our existence. To put it in other words, “make this life worth living”. Some of us do find a reason. Some of us keep looking. Some of us give up. Some of us don’t have a choice.

As for me, it may sound a bit like romantisizing with the idea- I am still to find my true calling in life. And it might well take that long before I find it but I will not stop looking.

"
Things get in the way
Rush of every day
Ordinary stuff we all get into
Wouldn’t it be sad
If all you ever had
Was a granite epitaph that said I meant to

"

CRANKY.

So Today, without any reason I am cranky. I guess I even woke up with a frown on my face. And everyone seems to suck. And everything seems to…errr suck. My vocab is limited to expletives and my expression is confined to a puckered brow.

I am soo bored and Life is such a DRAAAG. And You! who never replied to my mail- Don’t even bother now, just pisss off!! You, who thinks you are like THE smartest creation of God, heehee Really?? YAWWWWN!! The dog out there that just cannot stop OR help barking, put a Happy Christmas sock in it!! The uncleji on the street who cannot stop honking, for all humanity's sake- shoooooo awayyy!! From the keyboard of my laptop to the post that I am about to publish and to next galaxy in space- everything and anything sucks.
I am the self proclaimed grouchiest person alive for the day.
With due respect, This goes out to the world (Just for the day) KINDLY SUCK IT!!

Psst: This post when read in a similar mood would make much more sense.

I guess I never thanked you enough..

Aage Nikal Rahe Hain Hum…

In 1960 they registered with the BSE. By 1966, they became the largest producer of two-wheelers in India. Almost a monopoly, the waiting list for Bajaj scooters averaged 10 years. And then there was Hero Honda with its innovative, fuel-efficient, chic bikes. The market began to shift to motor bikes and Bajaj was a wee bit slower to react. But Better late than never: Pulsar happened.

From an uninspired scooter manufacturer to the best selling motorcycle maker in the country, Bajaj has come a long way. Their latest launch Pulsar 220 DTS-Fi**is THE hottest thing in the market. This one’s definitely male!!

And we are back to Humara bajaj again. Naye Bharat ki nayi Raftaaar…
Check out bajaj-

THEN

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oWFSG0YL_mM

and NOW:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oefu6dBWrJU


** Digital twin spark fuel injection system
Psst: Trust me I actually reeeaaally studied Mechanical Engg. I had like the best attendance record ever!! :D
And for those of you who are wondering about my interest in bikes. Well..I do ride bikes, you know the pillion way ;)

Lost and never found..

A song that brings back memories of a moment.
A place that reminds of someone.
A thought you cannot control.
A fact you cannot ignore.
A time that has gone.

Do you reminisce the old times- Happy and sad both? Do you sometimes wonder-“What if..?” Do you wish to turn back time? Do you die to live a moment again? I know you do. And you know you cannot. There is no escaping this. Every moment lived is a moment lost and a memory born. For the better or worse, Life goes on.

And so as they say- This too shall pass.

Each moment a story unfurls,
In a life that lasts a few breaths,
I have come far, clueless how.
In a flash now is then.

My world is a delusion?
Beneath this vanilla sky,
I’d rather not know a vision from reality,
It is what you think it is.

There is forever,
Only for that which is gone.
Time is indomitable,
You lose it when you are in it.

I smile and look forward,
to what beckons.
There shall be my last.
I will have my forever too.

Confined and helpless
You and I prepare for victory,
What happens, is for the best,
I have known no better escape.

CONTRADICTION

The room is dim and bright,
My Head is blank and cluttered,
My Breath is steady and fast,
Your grip is firm and loose,
Your words are hollow and mellow.

Search within me if it suits you,
You will be lost and you will be found,
Ask me if you please,
You will be answered and you will be questioned,
Be with me if you dare to,
You will live and you will die.

I communicate with eyes and your soul is deaf,
You hit me hard and I am numb,
I comply and yet I fight,
You conquer and yet you loose.
I am hated and I am loved.

I see the clock tick,
The time is still.
The curtain moves,
There is no breeze.
My heart beats,
No, not for you.
And then a tear
Yes, I weep for you and me.

Come close, you will be far.
You know me,
And so you know you will never know me.
You don’t spell and I can still hear it all.
Every moment is a paradox.
My life is a flawless contradiction.

Overchoiced..

Fire never started on its own. Some things don’t work lest they are triggered. Maybe it’s the rain, maybe it’s me. I hereby inaugurate my blog. Irrational, forthright, clichéd and mine.

“Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
and sorry I could not travel both
and be one traveler, long I stood
and looked down one as far as I could
to where it bent in the undergrowth”

The Road not taken- Robert Frost (1874–1963).

A choice. A confusion. I’d rather have both than not have any.
There are some choices you don’t have. Your maid never had the choice of being you.
And then there are some no brainers. Say Harvard vs. IIPM, Black vs. Stark in-your-eye-lemon-yellow, Jude law vs. Imran Hashmi, Friends vs. Fashion House, Kishore Kumar vs. Himesh Reshamiya blah blah. And do trust me if you will, I have nothing against people who’d choose IIPM, Stark in-your-eye-lemon-yellow, Imran Hashmi, Fashion house and Himesh Reshamiya preferably or not preferably in that order. After all, choices are subjective. But these are rather obvious.
I talk of choices that create confusion. The ones that are almost equally good or equally bad for that matter. The ones that don’t tell you where they'll take you. The ones that are so different and yet so much the same. The ones that give you nightmares. The ones that make you smile. The ones that make you ponder. The ones that make you give up on the same. The ones that make life difficult. The ones that make life easy. The ones that challenge you. The ones that comfort you.
I am haunted by them. And glad that I am.

Therefore: My choicest confusions. and more.